Thursday, January 07, 2010

Someone Broke Into My Apartment Last Night

I have been up half the night gripping my floor and crying so hard I can barely breathe. I got home around 1 AM last night only to discover that someone, or perhaps several people, broke into my apartment yesterday. I am guessing they disguised themselves as delivery people and fooled my landlord into letting them into my apartment. I am so overcome with emotion right now. I can't believe something like this could happen to me.

Here are some pictures of the aftermath.

The bandit(s) had plastered every single flat surface of my apartment with post-its. Here are some more detailed photos:

There was one of these for every member of my family.

I think Jemaine Clement is the most beautiful man alive.

Neither I nor google know what "snarflehazen" means. I'm gonna guess it's hungarian for the f word.

Even my cat was hit by this post-band-it.

They even left some graffiti on my keyboard and bookshelf.

The notes where everywhere. I have a feeling I will find more over the next couple of months. I have strong suspicions about the identity of the main culprit, and I have a feeling that she (err uh OR he) had some accomplices.

I was crying out of love. I was gripping the floor because my heart was filling with happiness as a balloon fills with helium. I was afraid that if I let go, I would float away. I have the best family and friends in the world. No doubt about it.

P.S.- In case you weren't aware, my intials are HBO.